Last montg, after I posted reader Carolbrigid’s personal ANR experience on Bountiful Fruits, I was contacted by Dee, a happily married 64-year-old woman and mother of two grown children, who, after reading Carolbrigid’s beautiful story, was inspired to take the first step into the world of adult nursing with her husband of 37 years by her side. Dee is an inspiration to me. After nearly four decades of marriage, she and her husband continue to seek ways of bolstering and strengthening their relationship to create their own happily ever after. Love is such a blessing, no matter the stage of life. Dee has generously agreed to share her personal story with others, and as her journey progresses, she and I both hope that it inspires other couples to take control of their relationship, their happiness, and their desire–fearlessly and shamelessly.
Wishing you much happiness,
Loving Milk Maid
Like many women, Dee knew nothing about adult nursing until, after browsing the internet three years ago, she stumbled across a short article published on a now defunct health and wellness blog. While the post’s introduction briefly explained what adult nursing was, the remaining paragraphs touched much more on the health benefits that human breast milk could provide to its recipients. Dee noticed that a handful of comments had been left for the post’s author–and none of them were positive. Unlike other site visitors, who seemed to feel that they had somehow fallen down the bizarre rabbit hole of the internet Wonderland, Dee was intrigued, not only by the information written about breast milk, but by the adult nursing lifestyle itself.
“Reading that article made me think about my experience as a breastfeeding mother. When my oldest son was born 35 years ago, I planned to nurse him, but we had a lot of difficulty right from the beginning. Unfortunately, there wasn’t the breastfeeding help or information out there that new moms can find nowadays, so after three months, I just stopped trying, and when my second son was born two years later, I didn’t even attempt to breastfeed him. Those are decisions I regret to this day.”
While Dee said that her son’s time at the breast was one of the most wonderful experiences she shared with him, she admits that her husband, Randy, viewed breastfeeding as something meant solely for their son. “My breasts became less sexual to him,” she said. “Neither of us understood that we weren’t in an “either or” situation. After I read that article on adult nursing, I began to wonder what it would be like to breastfeed my husband.”
As exciting as the idea was, Dee said that she had moments of anxiety, concerned that her fantasies were somehow abnormal or wrong. She approached Randy with the information she’d found online to gauge his reaction, and while he wasn’t particularly shocked by the idea of adult nursing, he did not seem interested in trying it for himself.
“Looking back on that day, I realize that I was waiting for him to suggest it,” said Dee. “This isn’t really something you can talk about. I found that it was hard for me to tell my husband that I wanted to nurse him–and we’ve been through a lot! I felt silly, even the idea of bringing it up seemed ridiculous. I told myself I was too old for this anyway, that it was something for younger people to enjoy. I did everything I could to make it “not right” for us.”
But no matter how hard she tried, Dee couldn’t make the idea “not right”, and after more than two years had gone by since she’d first discussed the lifestyle with her husband, she found herself turning to the internet once more, in the hope of finding more information on adult nursing.
“That was when I found Bountiful Fruits, and I couldn’t believe it,” Dee said. “I began to see that nursing can be for anyone, not just for breastfeeding moms. I read the stories shared by “older” couples, and realized that, just like one of the other nursing couples said, I was looking for a form of intimacy that Randy and I could share if we are no longer able to experience sexual closeness. I wasn’t alone in any of this.”
Inspired by others’ adult nursing experiences, Dee decided to openly discuss her desires with her husband, who, after a brief moment of hesitation, agreed to indulge in a suckling session.
“He did it to make me happy,” Dee said. “I don’t think he was expecting to enjoy it as much as he did. Before we nursed for that first time, we were both nervous and uncertain, neither of us knew what to expect, and I was worried that it wouldn’t be everything I’d hoped for–but it was. It was perfect.”
That first nursing session, one that Dee refers to as an “experiment to test the waters” led to a second, and then a third. The couple soon found themselves working together to perfect Randy’s latch and suckling patterns, as they shared the closeness of a beautiful brand new dry nursing relationship.
“We are still very new to this way of life, and there’s a lot for us to learn, but what I’ve found so far has gone much further than my original expectations. Everything just seems so much better. Randy and I are closer than ever, and we’re both so much calmer, more relaxed, and content. Being semi-retired has allowed us to take the time nursing gives us, and to really enjoy every minute.”
Dee said she found great inspiration in Carolbrigid’s re-lactation journey, and while she’d never before considered the notion of incorporating lactation into her own ANR, it is now a factor she is contemplating.
“At this time, breast milk is not a priority for Randy, but he has agreed to support any decision I make. That’s such an important part of this whole experience, knowing that I can rely on him. Adult nursing is becoming a very big part of our marriage, and I could not be happier. I’m just sorry that we didn’t try sooner; it feels that we’ve missed out on so much.”
Dee is quick to add that she believes everything happens for a reason, and in its own perfect time, and encourages others not to miss “their time”.
“if you really want to open an ANR, don’t let anything stop you. I think a lot of people believe that older people don’t have the same desires as younger couples; I worked in geriatric home health care for many years, and I can tell you that this isn’t true. Like Carolbrigid said [in her story], you shouldn’t let being “older” deter you. I have never felt more feminine or youthful or in love. Randy and I are now living in the moment, we are living for us.”
And what a beautiful moment it is.
As of the publishing of this post, Dee and Randy have been nursing once a day for the past month, and have chosen to pursue lactation. Her story will continue on Bountiful Fruits.